Charlotte Rauner’s most recent poem to appear here was When I watch as you walk (September 2011).
Blue and crisp
By Charlotte Rauner
in my past life, blue
and crisp–filled with a shimmer.
Glossy I was, lovely,
simple. Possibly endlessly
nomadic, possibly
free. The worst of the
wanted people the darker
ones, the taller
ones, scare easier than
me, misconstrued
ocean. Relentlessly whispering
to the filth, the clouds
feared, in all depths of what
the bottom contains:
Arriving, using, universally wanted
loved by themselves
naturally receiving, inconsiderate.
Devoid is the ocean,
bare, yearning–
endless, empty–
filled with nothing
I ever knew. Hatred becomes
genuine, love, manipulated
the people curious. Body
of restraint, danger
of flowing freely. Ocean shouldn’t love
without respect, crash
without anger. The brown eyed
ones, the straight ones feel
needed, confusing themselves
with being wanted. Jealousy swarms
the painless catalyzing
them to want. I know but never tell, hear
what’s not being listened to
incessantly interested–
constantly caring. Still,
are the small eared ones, the skinny
fingered ones for wanting
and being wanted, unleashing,
craving to crush
the hopeful ones. Still,
I was an ocean in my past life,
forever known with the hunched ones, the
poignant ones. Cursed and crazed
striving to destroy the blue
in the red
lipped ones.
I can’t help comparing this poem to the one above “Unhappy” and I think they speak to the same emotion but in different languages. Blue and Crisp held my attention, made me work with the metaphors and the images, danced with my imagination. While “Unhappy” was a mirror to feelings I have known, with your waves you brought me to a new place in my own thoughts.