when darkness paused
and noticed the window
with the gap between the drawn curtains.

How long did it watch you
in the kitchen fixing supper
wrapped in steam and gold light?

Maybe you felt it, turned,
and wondered what the decision
would be–hold you here

or take you. As you moved
against it, I’m sure you were saddened to miss
the oily sunrise churning and churning beneath.

In the days that followed
you grew ever more silent
until even the silence you shared, ended

and we scattered your ashes over the field
before the snow fell.
Now, after how many months?

The curtains are opened 
after how many months?
Our skin stretches

our hearts reach
our eyes open, relieved
to be staring into the anodyne of distance.

I need to believe you dwell
in daydream
a slow and softened awareness

brightening the vista
that is the end of this long winter.