press my little bird hands
into the back pockets of your jeans
while you were washing dishes
at the sink,

babbling on: Mommy, Mommy,
I love you.

Then there was the youth
who played Simon Says 
to your aerobic routine.

I took jumps to your steps,
laughing as I tripped,
I wanted to go
where you went

I practiced to be
who you were.

The world split sideways
and I stumbled out
a teen traumatized
by the gory birth.

I’d’ve sworn you did it to me:
the red plague of my face,
the heartache,
the inexplicable serrating rage,

I beat at you as an extension
of self.

These years are quieter
and the miles between us ache
for your back pockets again,

to be in my adolescent womb,
that dumpy-brown carpeted house
with the over eager rose bushes,

all those rooms where I’d scream
Mommy! I love you!