Marc Carver’s poem Trolley appeared here in April 2011.
Dead drunk
By Marc Carver
By Marc Carver
I always remember when my father came back from the shops.
You could hear the bottles chinking in the bag
Even though he said he had been out for food.
I did not like him much when he drunk.
He changed
He had less time for me.
I didn’t really understand why people drank then,
Then when
I was a boy.
Even when my mum and me would meet him after a film sometimes
You knew that he had been drinking
You could smell it on his breath.
And he seemed different.
When he took the rubbish out
You could hear the bottles again
Especially
If
He had had a bad night.
Some days he could not get out of bed at all
Or had
To head back there in the afternoon.
On holiday he could disappear all night
And when you tried to wake him in the morning he would shout at me
And sometimes swear too.
I loved dad though
But knew that he could not change.
Some people can’t change
Or they get too old.
Dad has been dead a long time now,
He never got to see his grandchildren.
Sometimes my children ask about him
And I tell them that he was the best man in the world
The best man in the world
To me.
How I miss you
Dad.
I know a lot about this subject and felt the emotions intended behind this piece.
What a painful but loving memory.